Go with whatever works for you and your partner's desires. Others are more practical, such as the TomBoii Boxer Briefs, which are ultra comfy and can hold a dildo in place like no one's business. Some harnesses are strappy leather and sexy as hell, such as the Minx Harness from Aslan Leather. If you can, buy your first harness in real life rather than online so you can try it on. When you're ready to peg, you will need a strap-on dildo and harness. Sliquid H20 is an excellent choice, because it's safe to use with silicone toys and is flavorless and scentless. Silicone lubes can cause silicone toys to deteriorate. Because pegging usually means using a strap-on dildo (which is commonly made with silicone), you want a water-based lube. Before you work your way up to a dildo and harness, begin by inserting a finger, and then two, with plenty of lube. Safe pegging requires taking the same time and care you'd use during any anal penetration. What products and techniques should I use? Pegging also requires immense trust being penetrated anally with a strap-on dildo by a pro-domme or dominant partner allows cishet men to not only receive anal pleasure but become vulnerable and submissive, which is a common sexual desire. All BDSM involves consensual power exchange, and for some cishet men - who, in our patriarchal society, still tend to harbor the most power - submitting to a woman or other person of a marginalized gender gets them off. Pegging can also (but doesn't have to) be a part of BDSM dynamics. "I get why dick owners walk around like they’re the shit," Domina Katarina says of the place of power she entered through her experience pegging. Submissive cishet men may enjoy the erotic power exchange that occurs when their partners become the ones with the dicks. While some simply want to be penetrated for the prostate stimulation, for other straight couples, they may get off on the role reversal. You get a rush, like, yeah, I have this control." "Especially as a woman who is typically seen as submissive, it really does put you in a different position. "The power dynamics are amazing," Domina Katarina says. Outside of the physical pleasure of prostate and anal stimulation, both partners, commonly referred to as the bottom (receptive partner) and the top (penetrating partner), may enjoy the "taboo" of a role reversal, if receiving penetration is new for the partner with a prostate or penetrating someone is new for the top. The person with a prostate can usually let you know when you've found it as they'll start to feel sensations reminiscent of an orgasm. The prostate, or P-spot, is roughly three to four inches inside the rectum, about an inch in diameter. You’re opening yourself up to other avenues of pleasure," says New York City dominatrix Domina Katarina. “A lot of prostate owners don’t get to stimulate their prostate, and that’s a whole other orgasm available to you.
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